EE 052: It’s Like Watching Someone Eat With The Hopes That You Will Get Full

“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”  William Shakespeare

Self-doubt is one of the primary reasons many don’t take action towards losing weight, again.

They weigh their options (no pun intended).

“This program or that one?”

“Let’s see…last time I counted points and went to meetings.  The last, last time I went plant-based but didn’t keep that up because I missed cheese…I shudder at the thought of vegan cheese.  The last, last, last time I cut my calories to 500 and took a bunch of pills.  They all worked to a degree, but I gained all the weight back and then some.”

*Searches for “weight loss programs” on Google…scrolling, scrolling…

“Ooh, this one is a 28-day quick start program…I like quick!  Wait.  That one is cheaper and is 2 days longer.  Hmmm…what to do?”

“I know!! I’ll make a spreadsheet with the pros and cons of each.  Brilliant idea!”

You know…they are doing their research.

The truth of the matter is we all face times where our fear of failure outweighs our self-confidence. Busy-ness, under the guise of doing research, helps momentarily allay our fear.

Fear is a natural instinct that affects all of us. The problem with this fear is when it prevents us from doing things that truly better our lives. Case in point, losing weight.

Self-doubt can be attributed to many of these fears. The feeling that we’re not good enough, smart enough, nor creative enough is crippling. Add to that past weight loss failures and we up the level of busy-ness so we get a temporary reprieve.

Self-doubt stems from lack of self-confidence, to one degree or another. This could be due to outside influences (over-critical spouse) or past failure (I’ve gained all the weight back and then some).

Regardless of the root, nurturing yourself is vital to growth. Most fears are steeped in comparison to others.

“Carol lost 23 pounds counting points, and she’s kept it off for over a year!  I lost 25 and gained back 30.”

“Melissa went plant-based and made such amazing meals.  She posted beautiful pictures on Facebook.  Me?  I’m not a good cook.  If I had to choke down one more pea-protein shake or salad, I was going to lose it!”

Instead of comparing your experience to someone else’s, shift your focus. In reality, what someone else is doing has no direct influence on what you could be doing. It can be likened to watching someone eat with the hopes that you will get full.

There is always going to be someone better than you at something. But, you know what’s cool? You’re better at something than someone else. Own that.  Don’t try to run an imaginary rat race.

Be the boss of your own lane and focus on your actions. 

Find something special about you and highlight that. If you have a specific craft or gift, don’t shy away from sharing it. Building the balance in your Esteem Account in one area of your life will spill into others.  In turn crowding out self-doubt. Yes, even the doubt around losing weight.  Promise.

Self-doubt is sometimes inevitable. In fact, a little doubt can keep us honest. However, by eliminating the comparison to others and nurturing your self-esteem, you can successfully kick self-doubt to the curb!